Crazy Radio Stalker Story

We’ve all seen them… they come out to every remote your station does.  They call in constantly on the listener lines.  They show up unexpectedly at the radio station at all times of the day.  Yes, I’m talking about the crazy P1 stalk… er… listeners.

While I’ve never had one of my own stalkers, I have had the experience of sharing one with the rest of the airstaff.  We’ll call her “Linda” for the sake of argument and to protect the guilty.

I was working for a rock station, and “Linda” was a huge fan.  She was “39 year old heterosexual female, liked to smoke Marlboro cigarettes, and drink Budweiser Beer.”  How do I know this?  She put it in the letter that she sent to one of our morning show hosts.  I should also mention that the letter wasn’t written on stationery or even on a nice sheet of paper.  No… it was written on a series yellow post-it notes that also included a crudely drawn map for said morning host to find her house!  ”Linda” also sent every single one of our jocks a letter that day.  Each one personalized, and written in a different form.  Aside from the post-it notes letters arrived written on paper, 3 x 5 cards, and even one written on an envelope.  Not all of us received maps to her house, though.

“Linda” also had the habit of showing up at remotes to just hang out.  The first time I met her, we were doing a remote at a Quiznos.  It was also the day of our annual listener halloween party.  She was the first person at the remote and proudly told me that she was coming to the party that night.  I had no idea at this point who she was or how I was inviting a world of crazy upon our doorstep.  I politely thanked her for listening and wound up giving her a t-shirt.  But she stuck around for the entire remote to help us “promote” the radio station, and by that, I mean scare people off!  And true to her word, she showed up at the Halloween party that night.  In fact, she was the first on line!  While we were still setting up!  At this point, she had integrated herself into our lives and thought she was one of us.

There was one particular day when I decided to go to one of my favorite delis for lunch.  I took one of the station vehicles (get the logo out as much as you can).  As I was leaving, I heard someone call my name.  I looked up and “Linda” was standing on the porch of the apartment over the deli.  I didn’t know until then that that was where she lived.  ”I saw the van and thought you were coming to visit!”  Ummm…. no.  Now I can never go to one of my favorite delis ever again!

Coming soon, I will tell you about “Bob”… who is even crazier!

Kanye West Needs to Go Away

I didn’t watch the VMA’s.  But I saw the clip that everyone is talking about.  Kanye West had no right to LITERALLY steal Taylor Swift’s moment.

He is seriously no-talent hack who can only stay in the spotlight by trying to upstage others.  He can’t sing without a voice-synthesizer.

Now, from what I understand, he is supposed to be the first musical guest on the new Jay Leno Show.  If Jay and NBC were smart, they would drop him.  Better yet… they shoud REPLACE him with Taylor Swift!

C’mon Jay… DO THE RIGHT THING!!!

The Radio Promotions Director – An (abbreviated) Job Description

NOTE: I have started writing blogs about radio for a new site called Radio Twit. This article was written for that site, but I am posting it here on my personal blog, as well.  As I will do for any post I write.  please check it out.  We are just starting up and it is going to be a great resource for anyone either in radio or interested in radio.

I’ve spent the better part of my career in radio promotions. I’ve worked in small markets (Danbury, CT), large markets (Hartford, CT), and major markets (Boston, MA).  The one question that seems to be a constant throughout my career has been, “What exactly do you do?”

That’s actually not an easy question to answer. The thing that most people expect is that I’m the guy that just goes out and hangs banners and balloons. And yes, while that is a very small part of the job, there is so much more.

I guess the best way to start this discussion is that the Promotions Director is the person in the radio station that directly interacts with every single other department. From programming to sales, production, traffic, business, engineering, even reception. I also like to describe it as the person that the receptionist sends all the phone calls to when he/she has no idea where they are supposed to go.

Even though the jocks are the “faces” of the station, the promotion director is generally the mouth. When the jocks don’t want to answer an awkward question, it usually comes to the Promotions Director.

The Promotions Director generally works very closely with the General Manager and the Program Director to plot the marketing course for the station. Everything from how to brand the station, logo design, web presence, and so forth. You also have to work closely with the sales department to develop promotional programs for station clients. This is actually tricky because you have to make these programs fit in with the aforementioned branding and presence of the radio station. Here’s a simplistic example… You are a classic rock station, but your client wants you to give away tickets to, say, Britney Spears. How do you do this? Well, you don’t. This annoys not only the client, but the sales rep who already promised the client that we would do it. NOTE TO SALES… Please do NOT promise anything to a client until it has either passed through promotions or programming.

Most of the time, though, I’ve enjoyed putting together sales promotions. We usually have really cool prizes to give away, make much needed revenue for the station, and can look larger than life. While I was the Promotion Director in Danbury, I worked closely with a local travel agency who got us lots of trips to give away… cruises, Rio, a private concert with Jimmy Buffet in Anguilla. Plus we’ve given away backyard makeovers including new patios, grills, hot tubs, landscaping. Cars are always fun prizes to give away.

Sales promotions could also be very turn-key programs. The client places a buy and wants to give away tickets to their event. Simple enough. Divide the tickets up throughout the day. Usually with an emphasis on AM Drive and PM Drive. Have the jock take caller 9, include the :10 second tag and you’re done.

The problem with sales promotions is that in a lot of cases, the sales rep is focused on getting the sale and will promise the client things that are impossible to pull off, or are, quite frankly, not worth putting together based on the amount of the buy. Not true in all cases… I’ve certainly had my fair share of salespeople who “got it”. Who would sit down with me and discuss possibilities and what would work best for not only the client, but also the station. But it seems that at every station I’ve worked at, there was the one sales rep that made my life a living nightmare. Ironically, the one from my last station is someone I still keep in touch with and she will still come to me for ideas. Which I like. It helps keep my unemployed brain active.

Events: This is where a promotion director can really shine. I would say that about 80% of the events are pretty turn-key. Usually remote broadcasts where the station will show up at the client with the van, a tent, some prizes, and a jock who will do a series of 1:00 minute live spots imploring you to “Come down to XXXX Honda for Midnight Madness. The best deals of the year are here now!” But there are other events… festivals, consumer shows, seminars. I’ve loved working on each and every one of them.

Public Relations: Somebody has to get the word out to people outside of your listenership. My job consisted of writing press releases, being the station spokesperson, being interviewed, etc.

Community Relations: This warrants an entirely different blog post which will hopefully be coming soon.

Staff management: Weirdly enough, when I worked in a major market, I had an assistant. That’s it. And he split time between my station and the other AM station in the cluster. In the tiny market of Danbury, I had a full-time assistant, 8 per-diem part-timers, and at any given time 5 to 25 interns. Go figure. My job was to hire, in some cases fire, train, schedule (though I usually delegated that to the assistant), and try to keep everybody happy.

Vendor relations: I was responsible for seeking out and growing relationships with all kinds of vendors. People who made our t-shirts and premium items for giveaways, graphic designers, auto body shops (station vans get dinged), etc… Most of the time with little or no budget to work with. Advertising trade was my savior!

There is so much more to this job that I can ever put into one post. I’ll add more in the future. In the meantime, I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please feel free to leave a comment.

Slideshow Diary of the 2009 Relay For Life of New Milford

The video is set to “An Extraordinary Life” by Asia, which I think is the perfect song… it’s upbeat and positive.

Relay For Life of New Milford a Success!

I haven’t posted an entry for a while, but I’m back!  It’s been a long couple of months. My job hunt takes up a good deal of time and I have been getting more hours at my part-time job.  the thing that has been taking up most of my time has been the lead-up to Relay For Life of New Milford.

For those that don’t know, Relay is essentially an overnight event where teams walk around a track in an effort to raise much needed funds for the American Cancer Society.  People set up campsites, host fundraisers at their site, and come together for a great cause.  It is not only meant as a fundraiser, but to remember those who were taken from us and as a celebration for those of us who have survived.  This is the simplistic version.  To find out more about what Relay For Life is and how you can start a team, click here.

I’ve been on the Relay For Life committee for a few years, but have not really been that involved.  I was initially asked to be on the committee by a friend at the American Cancer Society. At the time, I was working for a couple of radio stations, and we were sponsoring the New Milford event. My friend told me that the committee there could use some help.  I signed on, but my involvement was primarily through the radio stations.  Last year, I was in the middle of going through my chemotherapy treatments (as well as conducting a full-time job search and working part-time), so even though I was a member of the committee, I wasn’t really involved. However, this year, I took on more responsibility.  I became the Publicity Chair, which meant that I handled all of the PR work.  I developed media contacts, wrote press releases, gave interviews, put together a slideshow to be used at the event, and helped out in any other way that I could.  And despite the chemo (which is now over), continuing job search, and, now, 2 part-time jobs, I took on the role because I felt it was important.  Also, selfishly, it would give me more PR experience to carry into whatever job I eventually get hired for (hiring managers… please check out my resume link).

We were under some pressure.  We had to meet certain fundraising goals, as the New Milford event had been declining in recent years.  Not only that, but after, literally weeks of unrelenting rain in the State of Connecticut,  we were worried about weather playing a factor.  The night before our event, a tornado touched down in Wethersfield, a town about 50 miles from New Milford.

The day finally came… June 27, 2009.  for the first time in nearly a month, not a drop of rain fell.  On us, anyway.  Other parts of the state had some wild weather.  But not our area, thankfully.  And people came!  It turned into an amazing event.  Everybody had a great time.

And while I don’t have the final numbers as of this writing, I do know that we exceeded our goal!  One team even raised almost $10,000 in just two weeks!

It was a lot of fun an a LOT of work.  But it was well worth it!  And I’m looking forward to next year’s event.

Celebrate.  Remeber.  Fight Back.

Relay For Life of New Milford Team Captain & Committee Meeting

Join us tomorrow night (May 4th) at Sarah Noble Intermediate School at 25 Sunny Valley Road in New Milford for our monthly meeting.  The team captain meeting kicks off at 6:30pm with the committee meeting taking place immediately after.  We will be talking about our “Paint The Town Purple” event happening on Saturday May 9th on the New Milford Green.  Stop by the meeting if you are interested in starting a team or joining the committee.  We can use your help!

Things to Never Do In Starbucks (or anywhere else)

I have to say that in my almost two years of working at Starbucks, I’ve come across some customer practices that never cease to amaze.  I know that I have probably done a number of these when I was on the opposite side of the counter in the past… but I will NEVER do them again.  Here are some examples of things to NOT do while you are in Starbucks, or any place:

1.  When you are at the counter ordering, please, please, PLEASE get off your phone.  This has become my biggest pet peeve.  I am a person, and I deserve your attention.  I know that you are the customer, but it’s not fair that you keep me (and the line) waiting because whatever you are doing is too “important” to pay attention.  If you have to make or finish a call… please do it BEFORE you get in line.

2. Please don’t argue with me about what constitutes a drink.  Starbucks put a lot of attention into training me and the thousands of baristas all over the world.  I’m pretty sure I know the difference between a latte and a cappuccino.  A Latte is espresso with steamed milk topped with a little bit of foam… a cappuccino is espresso with foam and a little bit of milk.  I had a lady come into the store a couple of months ago and order “A cappuccino, but instead of foam, make it with all milk.”  When I tried to explain to this person that she was, in fact, ordering a latte, she just about lost her mind.

3. If you don’t know the difference between an Americano and Espresso… please ask.  As baristas, we love to talk about coffee and will be more than happy to explain what all of the different drinks are.  For example, a gentleman came into the store and ordered an iced venti americano, but hold the water.  Now the difference between an espresso and an americano IS water.  I politely treid to explain this, and he started yelling at me about how he knows what his coffee drinks are, and how dare I question him, etc… Sir… obviously you have NO IDEA what the drinks are.

4. Please don’t stick gum under the tables… enough said.

5. Don’t put your feet on the tables.  This actually happens more than I care to mention.

6.Seriously, your dogs are not allowed in the store.  Aside from the fact customers or staff may be allergic, it is against health codes, and we could get shut down.  This is not my decision, so please don’t yell at me when I ask you take him/her outside.  Believe me… I love dogs, but there are laws.  Obviously, service dogs are the exception.  But no, I don’t believe that the Jack Russell Terrier in your handbag is helping you to navigate.

7. Don’t assume that because we are working in a coffee shop that we are not smart or have no ambition.  I have a college degree, spent over 15 years in various marketing and public relations careers, and am an accomplished musician.  I, like many others, have fallen on hard times and am doing what I need to do to survive.

8. If you don’t want to leave a tip in the tip jar, that’s perfectly fine.  It won’t affect the quality of your service.  But please don’t advocate that we should get rid of them.  I count on that extra income.

9. Please don’t blame me if we run out of coffee.  It happens.  There is a finite amount of coffee in the brewer.  We constantly have to make more.

10.  Don’t  let your children run around the store.  It bothers other customers and is dangerous for the child.  You decided to have a child,  He/She is YOUR responsibility.

11. We can’t help it if the line is long.  There a lot of other people besides you that would like a drink.  We can only make them as fast as the machines pull shots and steam milk.

12. When you order 13 drinks, please don’t tell me after I have rung them up that the 4th one needs to be paid for separately.  This actually happened to me yesterday.

13. We can’t help it if the power goes out.  This happened a couple of weeks ago in my store.  A transformer blew up the street plunging the entire area into darkness.  No… the coffee brewers don’t work without electricity.  And yes… we have to ask you to leave the store.

14. Don’t take the wrong drink off the bar and then come back to tell us we made you the wrong drink.

15. I’m sorry that you have to pay for WiFi in our stores.  I had nothing to do with this decision.  It’s the way it is.  If you don’t want to pay for it, the library up the street has free service.

16.  Don’t snap your fingers at me.  I am not your slave.

17. We really do our best to keep the lobby clean and try to keep the garbage cans from overflowing.  We are busy, and unfortunately, short-staffed.

18. When you place your order, please speak in a loud enough voice so that I can hear you.  With blenders, espresso machines, and coffee grinders all going at the same time, not to mention the music playing and people talking, I am dealing with a lot of extraneous sound.  If I ask you to repeat your order, it’s only because I want to make sure that it’s right.

19.  We close at 9:30… so if you come at 9:45, the doors will be locked.  I can’t tell you how many people show up, pull on the locked door, look at the sign in the window that shows our hours, look at me, then back at the sign, and pull on the door again.  And please don’t plead with me that you only want a cup of coffee… We’ve already dumped it, cleaned the brewers, and shut down the registers.

20. It never hurts to say hello and smile at your baristas.  A little acknowledgement can go a long way.

I realize that you are the customer and that the customer is always right.  I bring up these points because it’s just good etiquette. We would like and deserve to be treated with a some respect.  We work hard… we’re are on our feet for 6 to 8 hours in a row… and really do want to keep you, our customers, happy.

Taylor Swift Meets Coldplay in a CLASSICAL Music Mash-Up

I thought that this was an absolutely brilliant arrangement of  “Love Story” and “Viva La Vida”  Stay tuned at the end for the story behind how it came to be.

2009 “Relay For Life” of New Milford Promotional Video

My friend, Cindy put this together.

Make sure you join us for this year’s “Relay For Life.”  Check out our website by clicking here.

New Voiceover Service

My friend, Samantha Stevens, has started a voiceover business.  If you are a radio programmer, advertising agency, or anybody that needs professional voice work, check out Sam’s web site at www.acvoicetracks.com.